


The Basics

by witchbreaker



Category: Naruto
Genre: Fluff, Humor, M/M, Pranking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2016-01-01
Packaged: 2018-05-09 10:53:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5537252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/witchbreaker/pseuds/witchbreaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kakashi shouldn't have pushed Iruka so much. Iruka shouldn't have given Kakashi a mystery to solve.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Iruka Umino, what are you doing?” The ANBU with purple hair asked as the man in question pulled out a paint brush and ink from a bag and started to paint seals on a door. 

“I’m pranking Hatake.” Iruka responded without stopping what he was doing. The ANBU paused at that. 

“What?” 

“I’m pranking Kakashi Hatake.” Iruka repeated. “More specifically, I’m going to paint-bomb his apartment.” 

“….why?” The ANBU was clearly having trouble figuring out why she was dealing with Iruka’s temporary, he swore!, return to his hellion days than an assassination attempt. 

“Because he pissed me off.” The long answer was that Kakashi had turned in one too many shoddy reports, had provoked him into arguments, and had generally been an insufferable ass for the last month. 

“I see.” She replied. It really didn’t sound like she did. “You’ll never get into his apartment.” 

“I doubt that. How much do you know about sealing?” Iruka carefully placed several symbols above the door handle. 

“Enough.” 

“And I’m going to guess you’re familiar with Hatake’s ridiculous loathing for the hospital.” 

She made an affirmative noise. It really wasn’t a secret. Anyone who had consistently dealt with Kakashi or knew the medic-nins were aware of it. Unless he was dying, Hatake would rather recover in his apartment then spend an extra second in the hospital. 

“I’ve heard a lot of stories about him fleeing there with broken bones, chakra exhausted, dangerously low levels of blood.” Iruka made flapping motion with his hand. “There are also a couple of him nearly dying because he went back to his home when he shouldn’t have. Somebody had to drag him to Tsunade on a couple occasions so that he would make it.” 

The ANBU nodded. This was also common knowledge. 

“Which tells me everything I need to know about his security system.” 

She cocked her head to the side. “How so?” 

“Well, if Hatake is use to coming back to his home in bad shape then he has to have a system of traps that he can easily disable. Something that doesn’t require working arms, vision, a lot of chakra, or him being able to move quickly. That means he has a chakra-lock system. A set of seals that can disarm his traps via a little chakra placed into the right spot on the front door.”

“Why not the window?” She asked. It was Kakashi’s preferred method of entry after all. 

“We’re five stories up. I may not know what missions Hatake takes but I _know_ he can’t assume that he will be in good enough shape to walk up past all the traps that the other shinobi in the building have placed on their windows.” 

“I still do not see how this will allow you get access his home.” 

“Because Hatake placed a bypass on his security seals.” 

“How can you be so sure?” Her knowledge of seals was, admittedly, limited but this theory seemed to be a stretch. 

“There are two ways for multiple people to use a chakra lock. The first is to set up an incredibly complex series of seals that have to have everyone placed their chakra into the lock while it is being created. Hatake doesn’t have the space for it. Even if he chucked out all of his furniture and painted in every single corner, he’d still be a good twenty feet short.” Iruka bent down and re-dipped his brush in ink. 

“And the second way?” 

“After a single-person seal has been created you can add a bypass into it so that someone else can open it. It’s tricky, but doesn’t take up as much space as the other option. Most people don’t do this because seals have a tendency of, well,” he scratched the side of his face. “exploding when you try to adjust them.” 

The ANBU got the impression that Iruka knew this from experience. 

“Anyway, Hatake is smart and trained in seals so he doesn’t have to worry about destroying his apartment. There we are!” The seals that Iruka had been painting activated and showed the seals that had been hidden on the other side of the door. The ANBU recognized his seal as the one that administration used to look into messages for traps. She had been taught in during her brief stint as an Intel goffer. 

Iruka face broke out into a big grin. He tapped a tri-part symbol in the center of the door. She could see that only two out of the three circles on it were filled. “This is perfect. He already has a slot for someone else. I just have to key my chakra to it.” 

“And where are you going to get Kakashi’s chakra to allow you to do that?” The question was asked mildly, but there was steel hidden behind her tone. Personal chakra did not exist outside the body for long. There were few ways you could get it that didn’t require a knife. 

“And _that_ is where things tricky.” Iruka didn’t seemed bothered by his predicament. In fact, he looked happy at being able to show her exactly how he was going to out smart Kakashi Hatake. He reached into his bag and pulled out a set of exploding tags then a set of chakra paper. “Have you ever made exploding tags before?” 

“No.” 

“Okay,” The ANBU wondered if Iruka was even aware he was teaching her or if he was always this eager to explain things. “Besides the ink and paper you need to to place your chakra into it. That is how it ignites. Your chakra interacts with the chakra that the seal master imbued in it, it traces the ink, and then ignites when both chakras mix enough. Hatake made these tags. We had a mission together two months ago.” 

“Yes, the disaster involving the Daimyo’s third son.” 

Iruka blushed at that. The whole mission was supposed to give Kakashi a breather while giving Iruka a chance to get out of the village since the Academy was on break. It had gone down hill before they had even manage to make it past Konoha's gates. 

“Well, um, these have Hatake’s chakra in them.” Iruka barreled on. “And the the chakra paper is going to draw it out.” 

She watched him return to the seal layered on the door. He traced the points out from the tri-seal. She watched his finger move across the lines for over an hour before he seemed to finger out what he was looking for. The exploding tags were sandwich in-between the chakra paper and then quickly placed at various sections of door. The ANBU saw him push the tiniest amount of his chakra into first piece of paper, which did _something_ to the tags and set off the second piece of paper and the seal on the door. Iruka quickly pushed his chakra into the empty slot.

The whole seal glowed blue before settling back to black. 

Iruka gathered the pieces of paper off of the door, snatched his bag off of the ground, and turned to the ANBU. He was flushed, this time with success. 

“Would you like to come in?” 

She nodded, thankful her mask hid her surprise. Iruka turned the door handle and paused before actually entering the room. His hesitation when he took the first few steps told the ANBU that he wasn’t as sure that his plan was going to work as he pretend it would. 

Once the rooms had been surveyed, Iruka placed a few of Kakashi’s personal items into his food cupboards. He then went on to rigging a series of packets filled with paint around the apartment. 

“How do you know sealing?” The ANBU asked as she closed the door. The training was not something most ninja knew. It took too much effort to memorize all that you needed to even make a simple exploding tag and the prep necessary made it pointless to try and implement it in battle. Unless your sensei specialized in it, it wasn’t something that you picked up. 

“I was taught some when I was given my first class. I liked it so I tried to expand my skills in my free time.” 

“Ah.” His first class would have been the one with the jinchuriki. Of course, the Hokage would make sure that his teacher was prepared to subdue him if the child got out of control. “Why stay at the Academy? I’m sure the infiltration division would appreciate your skills.” 

“I _like_ teaching.” He countered. “Training the next generation of Konoha shinobi is my calling. Besides, this took,” He glanced at a clock and grimaced. “Six hours to do. I need too much time to make this useful in the field. You caught before I was even a third of the way through.” 

“You weren’t really trying to hide.” She pointed out. 

“You don’t _hide_ from ANBU for pranks. You get them on board.” 

She was about to protest that she wasn’t onboard with this except she realized she had no intention of stopping him or undoing his work once he was gone. She also wanted to see if Kakash-taicho would fall for this prank. Either way he had a point. 

“I’m all done.” He said after double checking everything was in the correct place. He shuffled both of them out of the apartment and redid the warding. There was a grin on his face and a bounce in his step. Iruka couldn't _wait_ to see Kakashi when he came back from his latest mission. “Have a good night ANBU-san.” 

She watched him walk off and started to tail him. He didn’t do anything suspicious, went home, showered and drank coffee after realizing sleep was pointless considering it was dawn, and then went off to the Academy to teach. She watched through his first class before going to Ibiki to report what had happened. 

His only comment was that he wasn’t surprised. 

“Should I tell Kakashi-taicho?” She asked him. 

“No, a mystery will keep him from running off on the next A-Rank he can get.” She repressed the urge to fidget. Her former captain wasn’t exactly taking the break up of his Genin team well. “And Iruka-sensei deserves to have his fun. Go home, Yugao.”

The dismissal was a relief especially since Ibiki didn’t want her to write a report on how a school teacher manage to get past the security of one of Konoha’s most feared ninja with ink, a brush, a set of exploding tags, and some chakra paper. 

There was some paper work that you just never wanted to file.


	2. Chapter 2

Kakashi disarmed his traps, entered his home, and immediately spotted something flying towards his face. Naturally, he stabbed it with a kunai. It exploded into a cloud of pink at the same time everything in his apartment exploded. The riot of colors that immediately stuck to his skin had Kakashi thinking only one thing.

 _Contact poison!_

He stripped off his clothes as he jumped backwards into the hallway. The cloud of poison didn’t follow him nor was there a second attack. Kakashi stood in the hallway, Sharingan spinning furiously, kunai in hand, and stark naked. 

It took him a minute to realize that another attack wasn’t coming and that he was standing in the hallway covered in paint because someone had pranked him. He might have found this amusing except he couldn’t figure out who would have done such a thing. 

He slide back into his apartment and surveyed the damage. His home was covered in bright paint that ranged from pink to green. It was already dry, which he couldn’t tell was a blessing or a curse, and _everywhere_. Walls, ceiling, furniture, cabinets. Nothing was spared from the spray. 

_Well, not everything._

His personal effects, the few that they were, had been placed in the pantry out of the way. Which meant someone he knew had done this. He couldn’t see a stranger bothering. His first guess was Naruto but he had left for training over a year ago. Sakura was neck-deep into her apprenticeship with Tsunade and Gai was still busy with his Genin team. There would also be glitter if Gai had done this. That left his former teammates still in ANBU. 

The lack of knives hinted that it wasn’t them. 

Whoever it was was good. The paint covered up any linger scents and the prank had destroyed any evidence of the fox's presence. The only hint that Kakashi had was the fact that his own traps were untouched. 

Curiosity raced through him. It had been a long time since someone had gotten one over him like this. Even longer since he had something to occupy himself that didn’t involve a mission. This felt like a challenge and he was more than willing to accept. 

First things first, he needed to get his apartment looking less like a circus puked all over it. His traps also clearly needed updating and he should probably refill his fridge. 

Then he’d get to work drawing this trickster out into the open. 

(~)

Umino’s mouth was in a thin line as he tried to stifle his laughter. It was more than Kakashi could say for Genma who was snickering to his heart’s content. The Copy-nin did make a sight. He had changed his clothes but there was nothing he could do to remove the paint from his hair or his skin. The result was that his hair was a mixture of pink, yellow, and bright blue. His visible eye was purple and his hands and feet were green. The contrast between them and his uniform was stunning. Which suited Kakashi just fine. 

“Maa, I heard you had something for me Umino-sensei.” Kakashi said as though he wasn’t making a scene in the Mission Room. 

The man cough and then reached for the scrolls under the desk. “Yes, right. B-Rank retrieval mission came in this morning.” 

Kakashi took it without comment and Body Flickered out of the room. By the time he would get back to the village, news about the prank would have spread like wildfire. If his trickster was rash _and_ clever he wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to gloat. Kakashi might not have many friends, but he was well aware who the best gossips were. It would be simple to eavesdrop on them. Bait set, he got down to business finding a stolen family heirloom. 

(~)

It turned out that his trickster was more than capable of keeping his mouth shut. Kakashi came back to curious stares and not so subtle questions about who had pranked him. A point in his favor. 

What his trickster _couldn’t_ do was resist another prank. Two weeks later, Kakashi had come home to more exploding packets. He dodged this time and avoided the rain of glue and chicken feathers. They were only at the entrances which was nice. If Kakashi had to keep replacing his furniture at this rate he’d have to worry about his bank account. He quietly cleaned up the mess and made sure to appear as though nothing had happened. 

This seemed to annoy the fox. The next trick happened soon after and was a little on the mean side. Really, who put plastic wrap over the toilet seat? That was just cruel. It also meant that he had to reorganize his list of suspects. This wasn't any of his friends’ style. The good news was that he had confirmation that whoever it was had connections to the Mission Room. All of these had occurred while Kakashi was out on a mission and that could not be a coincidence. Unfortunately, that did not narrow done the field of suspects as much as he would have liked it too. 

The Mission Room was staffed by nearly two dozen ninja who rotated in and out of duty. The majority of them were teachers, members of the T&I department, and those who dealt with the messenger hawks. Unlike the rest of Konoha’s military force, they rarely left the village. Because of this they were the most popular shinobi around. Almost always available for a drink, a spar, a shoulder to cry on. Kakashi knew several people who depended on them to keep them grounded in their fast and short lives. It also meant that their social circles were huge. After shadowing all of them for a month, Kakashi is convinced that Umino-sensei alone knows half of Konoha. His trickster could easily be one of their many friends. 

When Kakashi came back from a long mission, he decided to change tactics. The sight of _everything_ in his apartment tin-foiled was not something he wanted multiples of. He was filled with annoyance and awe at the fact the fox went to such lengths as covering his individual sheets and the lint under the table. It took Kakashi two days to de-tin-foil his home and then he was _still_ finding the silver material on things. 

Since re-con clearly wasn’t working he upped his traps from ‘probably-won’t-kill-a-Genin’ to ‘capable-of-catching-Gai.’ 

Kakashi returned to find everything he owned painted neon green. He removed his non-lethal traps and redesigned the layout of his home. 

The prankster covered his floor in cups filled with koi. 

Kakashi left one of his summons in the apartment to watch over it. 

The fox knocked out the ninken and glued Kakashi’s furniture to the ceiling. 

The Copy-Nin glared at everything. The other ninken were never going to let Uhei to live this down but that didn’t help Kakashi’s own wounded pride. He dismissed the dog and spent the whole night setting up traps that even _he_ would have a hell of a time getting past. 

That afternoon there was a small scarecrow sitting on his kitchen table. 

Kakashi stared at it, his one visible eye twitched violently. A small fire jutsu reduced the thing to cinders and he began throwing all his things into the hallway. He was intent on sealing the whole thing with one’s taught to him by the Fourth Hokage himself. The Copy-Nin was _not_ going to let some fox laugh at him like this. Lack of access to his home for the next week would be a small price to pay for finally stopping the trickster. 

He made his emergency access seal visible so that he could take it down when he spotted it. The third chakra key, which was suppose to be empty, was glowing. He nudged his forehead protector out of the way. The Sharingan confirmed that it was really there. 

Incredulousness replaced anger then came amusement. Kakashi feels his shoulders shake as he held back a laugh. No wonder he couldn’t catch the fox. All his traps were linked to this seal. Once keyed into the matrix, it would have been easy to get in and out. He hadn’t been had this good since…Kushina-sama. 

His mood dimmed at the thought of red head. These pranks would have had her howling with laughter. He could almost hear it echoing off the walls of his bare apartment. Kakashi pushed his thoughts away from the dead and returned to his current problem. Going to the third keyhole, he touched the chakra there. It felt familiar. 

_Umino Iruka. He must have gotten my chakra from those exploding tags I made._

Mentally scrolling through their interactions for the last six months, Kakashi noted that he had angered the Chunin at least eight times. Not unusual considering how much Umino was a stick in the mud about reports, but plenty of reason to pull something like this off. Iruka had been on his list of suspects though not very high. Kakashi hadn’t believed he had a sense of humor necessary for this. Clearly he was wrong and the Chunin had more in common with Naruto than he previous thought. He’ll have to pay him a visit once this is taken care of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like this HazelBeka. Part 3 should be up today/tomorrow. Happy New Year's everyone.


	3. Chapter 3

“How did you do it?” Kakashi appeared directly before Iruka’s desk, cutting in front of the person that the Chunin was going to give a mission to. Iruka blinked at him then grinned. 

“I’m not going to tell you that.” There was a distinct air of victory around him. Kakashi tried to be annoyed but failed. 

“Maa, don’t be like that.” 

“The answer is still no. Go away. I have work to do.” Iruka went to reach around him and pass a mission scroll off but Kakashi blocked it. 

“I’ll trade you,” He offered. “Technique for technique.” 

Iruka didn’t even blink though the rest of the room was now paying close attention. It wasn’t everyday that the legendary Copy-Nin offered to share his collection of jutsu. 

“Figure it out, Hatake-san. Now, unless you have something for me get out of the line.” 

“Challenge accepted.” Kakashi disappeared in a swirl of leaves. 

“What was that about?” Asked the ninja that Iruka had been trying to hand the scroll to. 

“Nothing important.” Iruka could feel the skepticism in the air. He didn’t care. The fact that he had tricked Hatake successfully gave him a good feeling that was going to last a month at least. 

It took a week before Iruka thought that he should have just answered Kakashi’s question. 

(~)

“Want a partner?” 

Iruka jumped at the sudden voice. He spun around to find Kakashi leaning against a tree, nose deep in a book. He has no idea how long the Jonin has been there. He was sure the training field was empty when he started practicing. 

“What?” 

“Do you want a partner? Practicing katas isn’t really the same as having a good spar.” He turned the page in his book. If this wasn’t the first time that Kakashi had ever offered to help him with anything, Iruka would have assumed that it was a casual suggestion. There was clearly another motive. Kakashi wanted to see his combat skills. 

“That’s not very subtle, Hakate-san.” 

Kakashi gave him a looked that screamed amusement. “I think we’ve gone past subtle, Umino-sensei.” 

He had a pointed and it had been a long time since Iruka had a sparing partner that was past puberty. The other teachers at the Academy didn’t share his desire to train on their day off. 

“Sure, why not.” 

Two hours later, Iruka lay panting on the ground and resisting the urge to cradle his left arm. He knew that his combat abilities weren’t close to the Jonin’s but he hadn’t felt this overpowered since his pre-Academy days. Iruka’s one small comfort is that Kakashi at least looked like he had been fighting if not particularly tired. 

“You alright there, sensei?” Kakashi asked as he stood over him. 

“I’m fine,” Iruka replied. “Just give me a minute.” 

“This was fun,” _for you_ Iruka thought. “We should do this again sometime.” 

“Don’t you have other Jonin to spar with?” Iruka asked as he took the hand Kakashi offered and pulled himself off the ground. 

“But you’re always around!” Kakashi said, his visible eye curving into a smile. “And I want to learn that handy echo-location technique of yours.” 

“Don’t just spar with me to pick up my jutsu!” 

“Whatever you say, Umino-sensei. See you next week.” He was gone before Iruka could retort that there was going to _be_ no next week. 

(~)

Iruka dried off his hair and enjoyed the moment of quiet. It had been an exhausting day. Shuriken practice followed by Konohamaru deciding to fool around. The mess had covered the classroom and almost resulted in a brawl from those caught in it. Not to mention that Hatake kept popping up. Iruka had found him in his office this morning, writing comments on the homework he had left behind. 

Iruka was seriously considering telling him how he had gotten past his security seals if only to make the man go away. The only thing holding him back was the part of him that insisted a trickster never revealed their secrets. He liked knowing that Hatake still had no idea how he had done it. 

Iruka put the towel around his waist and opened the door to the bathroom. He wished that it was connected to his bedroom instead of the living room but it was small price to pay to live in this section of town. 

At least that is what he thought until he saw the spiky head of silver sitting on his couch. Kakashi turned his head as if to say something before stopping. He and Iruka stared at each other. The teacher could feel his rage bubbling up. The silence stretched on.

“Yo.” 

“GET OUT!” Several sharp objects punctuated that sentence; embedding themselves where Kakashi had been sitting a second ago. The Copy-Nin had apparently disappeared at that command. 

Iruka didn’t believe that for a second and when he came out of his bedroom dressed, Kakashi was still sitting on his couch. Albeit on the opposite side where Iruka’s kunai had landed. 

“What are you doing here?!” The Chunin demanded. 

“Well, I was helping this little old lady’s kitten out of a tree when I saw that your window had a rainbow on it,” Iruka opened his mouth to call bullshit on that but Kakashi kept going. “And since you’ve been breaking into my apartment, I figure I was welcome here.” 

Iruka froze right before he was about to shout again. Kakashi raised an eyebrow; daring him to be a hypocrite about this. Iruka’s jaw clicked shut and he stomped off to grade the papers he had gotten today. 

It didn’t really help as he had to do them on the kitchen table and Kakashi was right there reading his stupid book. 

(~) 

“I’m not feeding you and your dogs, Kakashi-san.” Iruka said as soon as he opened his door. The sight of the whole pack lounging around his apartment was new but Iruka had long since given up getting Kakashi not to drop in whenever he wanted to. 

“Maa, don’t be like that sensei. I’ve already gotten the groceries.” 

Iruka glanced at the kitchen table and confirmed that there were enough ingredients there to make ramen for ten. How Kakashi had figured out his favorite food, he didn’t know. 

“Make your own food.” 

“You’re the better cook though.” Kakashi scratch the ear of one his dogs. Said dog was giving Iruka the stink-eye, but he had gotten use to it. Uhei still hadn’t forgiven him for knocking him out that one time. 

“Considering you have never made me one thing, I doubt that.” 

“There isn’t anything else to eat in here.” 

Iruka knew he was right, he had been meaning to shop for days, but that didn’t mean he was saying it out loud. “Don’t you have something better to be doing? It’s not like you haven’t figured out how I pranked you already.” 

“Actually, I haven’t.” Kakashi went back to reading his book just as Iruka looked over at him. 

“Really?” 

“I’ve learned a lot about _you_ which tells me that I don’t have a single idea how you were able to key yourself into my security seals.” 

“Then you need a refresher in intelligence gathering.” Iruka said as he checked over what Kakashi had gotten. It did look good. 

“Umino Iruka, graduated age eleven, promoted to Chunin at sixteen on your second attempt. Started as a substitute teacher soon after and was given your own class at the age seventeen. You prefer ninjutsu despite the fact that you don’t have the chakra stores to use anything about a B-Rank in battle. You have an affinity for Fire and Yin Release but have learned Water Release probably to connect with your father who was from the southern coast of the Land of Fire. He passed down that echo-location jutsu which he developed to deal with Mist ninja.” 

Iruka stared at him. Kakashi was completely correct and it was unnerving. 

“You were taught sealing by the Samdaime when you became an official teacher and have become good at it. Your specialty is barrier seals both putting them up and taking them down. The adjustments you’ve been attempting with the basic four corner seal have potential even if you still haven’t figured out how to keep it from exploding. Your major weakness it that you don’t have any upper level techniques necessary to tip the tide of a battle or get you out of situation if it all goes to hell. You could make the jump to Jonin but that would require more time to train than the Academy allows you. You’d have to quit teaching and rejoin the general pool of ninja, which you aren’t willing to do. Frankly, Tsunade probably wouldn’t allow it. You have the best graduation rate out of all the teachers as well as the highest rate of acceptance into Jonin teams.” 

Iruka blinked. “There’s no way I have the highest rate for Jonin teams.” 

“Look it up yourself.” Kakashi said as he turned another page in Icha Icha. “Teachers might not normally have access to them, but I’m sure you can get your hands on a copy of the report. Either way, all the signs point to you not using a jutsu to get into my seals but a trick. I know you used a basic Admin seal to make it appear on the outside of the apartment and then my exploding tags to get the seal to think that I was adding someone to it, but how you got my chakra out of tags without corrupting it with your own is still a mystery.”

“There’s hospital equipment that can do it.” Iruka pointed out as he turned the stove on. 

“None of it has gone missing or been bought in the last five years. Besides, Tsunade would have killed you if you had taken it. As much as you liked pranking me, I doubt you would even dare to consider angering her.” 

“So, are we getting dinner or not?” Pakkun interrupted. 

Iruka looked over to the dogs’ questioning eyes. He sighed. “It will be ready in an hour.” 

There was a chorus of thanks. 

(~)

“Okay, you have to spill.” Gemna demanded as he and Iruka finished up with the in the Mission Room for the night. 

“Spill what?” 

“What you did to Hatake. He’s been submitting his reports _on time_.” He waved the report that Kakashi had handed to Iruka this afternoon in the latter’s face. Iruka made a grab for it so that it could be filed instead of being used as a pointer but Genma tossed it to Raido. 

“Holy shit, this isn’t chicken-scratch either!” The other ninja said as he checked over the scroll. Iruka snatched it back. “Did you blow him or something?” 

Iruka went bright red. “No, I didn’t.” He snapped, pointedly ignoring that he had thought about it. “It’s nothing really. Kakashi-san’s just bored.” 

“Bored my ass.” Genma retorted. “Hatake takes A-Ranks when he’s bored. He’s just as much as a workaholic as you. Randomly appearing at your work and presenting perfect reports is _not_ what he does when he’s bored.” 

“Can’t a ninja keep a secret?” Iruka grumbled. 

“You already told Anko.” Raido pointed out. “She’s been gloating about being the only one in the know for months.” 

That had been a good time. Iruka had met up with his former teammate and told her about his tricks. Anko had laughed so hard she had cried. 

“She was my teammate, of course I talked with her.” 

“Being on the same team for one Chunin Exam does not make you teammates.” Gemna argued. “We’ve known you longer than she has.” 

“Come on, Iruka. If it’s nothing, why not tell us?” Raido said. Iruka sighed. 

“ _Fine_. I paint-bombed Kakashi-san’s home and he wants to know how I got around his security seal.” 

“You mean that day he came in covered in paint, that was _you?_ ” 

“Yes.” Iruka said, walking away. The other two stayed there in shock for a moment before catching up. 

“So, how did you get around his security?” Radio asked. 

“I’m not telling. Besides, it’s not going to work twice anyway.” 

Genma and Raido didn’t believe that and continued to pester him until Iruka Body Flickered back to his home. 

(~)

Iruka heard his alarm go off and slapped it into silence. He mentally debated whether or not it would be worth the trouble just stay in bed all day. 

“You’re going to be late.” Kakashi called out from living room. 

“Shut up.” Iruka groaned back. It was the Jonin’s fault he was feeling like Guy ran him over. Twice. Kakashi had convinced him that a no-holds-bar spar on a school night was an excellent idea.

Reluctantly, he rolled out of bed and stumbled into the kitchen. His uniform was only haphazardly on but he called it good enough for the moment. Kakashi handed him a cup that he drank from without looking at. This is definitely not Iruka’s own coffee which resembled vaguely brown water. It’s strong enough to raise the hair on the back of his neck. There might be some hope that he can make it through the day after all. 

“I’m still not happy with you.” Iruka muttered. 

“You were the one who agree to the fight, sensei.” 

“You goaded me into it so I hold you responsible. No amount of coffee is going to change my mind.” 

“Oh, so then you don’t want that.” Kakashi reached out for the cup. Iruka held it close to him. 

“No, you gave it to me. It’s mine now.” He finished off the coffee.

“Then you can be bribed.” 

“It wasn’t a bribe. It was a gift.” 

Kakashi’s eye curved into a smile. “If you say so sensei.” 

“I do.”

“Because there is no way the great Iruka-sensei could ever be bribed.” Kakashi teased. Iruka made a noise of affirmation as he pulled out food from the fridge. “Or maybe I’ve just haven’t found your weakness.” 

“If this coffee doesn’t do it than nothing will.” Iruka handed Kakashi some leftovers without turning around and started to reheat his own food. He could hear the Jonin dig in but didn’t bother to turn around. Kakashi never ate when Iruka was looking. 

“What about a new set of sealing books?” Kakashi said between bites. 

“Nope.” 

“A pass to the hot spring.” 

“I’ve already got that.” 

“I’ll cover you the next time you take Naruto out for Ichiraku.” 

Iruka paused. The offer was tempting considering how much ramen the blond went through. Eventually he shook his head. “Try again.”

“I’ll teach you the Water Dragon Bullet.” 

“No.” 

“I can get the Academy equipment supply replaced.” 

Iruka’s turned his head to actually look at Kakashi. “ _You_ have influence over over our budget?” 

“No, but ninja are allowed to donate their paycheck back into the village. It wouldn’t take much to redirect my usual contribution to that part of the Academy.” 

“I’m still not going to give in. You aren’t going to bribe me through my work.” 

“Oh?” Kakashi put his dishes in the sink next to Iruka. “Then personal is the way to go? I could show you how to get rid of those aches.” The teacher rolls his eyes. “How about a kiss?”

Iruka stiffened. Kakashi, who had been leaning into his personal space, rapidly moved away. He leaned against the wall, in a way that was suppose to be casual but felt awkward to Iruka. The silence that fell between them certainly was. 

“I don’t play that kind of game, Kakashi and if you are going to you need to leave right now.” The words were low and cold. Iruka could handle having a little crush on Kakashi while they were just friends. But if he pushed to add sex to it when Iruka knew it was just a means to an end…No. That was not going to happen. 

The Jonin gave a nod. “I understand.” 

Silence encompassed them. Iruka turned around and put his food back into the fridge. He was no longer hungry. 

“I’m not just here to find out your trick.” Kakashi said, quietly. Iruka stopped what he was doing. “I do like your company. It’s nice.” 

Iruka turned around to see Kakashi avoiding his gaze. “I like your company too. Even when you’re driving me up a wall.” 

“Maa, sensei, that’s the best part.” Kakashi gave him his little eye smile. Iruka snorted. 

“I can understand why you’re friends with Guy now. You love pissing people off.” 

“I don’t anger Guy. I give him the opportunity to be as exuberant as he wants to be.”

Iruka laughed. 

“You know, I’d kiss you without a reason.” Iruka stopped laughing. “I _do_ like you.” 

Kakashi appeared on the surface nonchalant but Iruka was beginning to learn how to tell when the Jonin actually cared. The brunette went red and scratch the side of his face. 

“Well. Then you better get over here.” 

Kakashi bridged the distance and had one hand in Iruka’s hair before the latter could blink. The teacher was late to work but that kiss was worth it.


End file.
